Delicious Quote

I Totally Just Got Mugged on the Bus

I was just mugged. I was taking an 11:15-ish outbound 27-Bryant home from work, and we'd only gone one stop when at 5th and Mission a blonde blur of a man snatched my iPhone right out of my hand then ran right out the back doors of the bus.

The most I could muster was to stand to my feet and yell, "HEY." He took me completely by surprise. I had my headphones on and with a single jerk he detached the phone cleanly from the headphone jack and forcibly removed it from my hand. A couple of goths, a couple, ran out after him, while I stood there stunned.

They screamed at him. There was yelling. I didn't make any of it out. I just stood there.

I can still feel the sensation of the forceful tug of the phone from my hand.

The bus driver called the police and reported the theft? Robbery? "Phone jacking" should suffice. He told the police the bus number and intersection and what happened, but there was no description given. I couldn't give you one either besides "white guy, blonde blur."

The female portion of the goth duo who valiantly ran after my robber ruined her hero moves by saying to me, "You really have to keep your phone put away." I gave her the fiercest fuck you eyes ever.

She's not wrong, but who wants to hear that 60 seconds after having their lifeblood and reason for living pricey gadget ripped from her hand?

The driver asked if I wanted to hold the bus up so the police could come and I could file a report, so of course I said no. I just rode home in shocked silence while people pity-stared at me. The male member of Goth Duo brought me his little flip phone and asked if I needed to call someone. I told him unless he had an iPhone withdrawal help line programmed in his Nokia then I needn't bother.

And may Paul Ryan strike me dead if I'm lying, but right after I was mugged I looked up to see an ad from this campaign in black and white right over my damn head. And thus, I am forced to admit: I knew the risk of having my phone out on the bus and took it. I have heard the stories. One of my very best friends had this happen months ago. It's not my fault my phone was stolen right out of my hand, but this was a clear case of iPhone addiction and a rampant bout of "I thought it wouldn't happen to me."

I came home and immediately told this very best friend what happened via FB message (how pedestrian!) because it happened to him just a scant few months ago. I described my ash blonde assailant to my Mexican/Filipino friend who said, "White on white crime. Such a shame."

Another friend was kind enough to check in on me via Gmail chat after I broadcasted my circumstance over all appropriate social media channels. Still pumped from the mugging I typed to my concerned friend, "That phone is totally smashed on the back and it is wearing that dirty case. So, haha, fuck you, motherfucker." (So witty and eloquent; don't you wish we IM'ed?) To which Concerned Friend replied, "Yeah, I was gonna ask if he handed the case back to you."

You can see why I call keep these smart asses around.

So, that's the story of my mugging. Now I'm phoneless. Oh, and I was able to remotely wipe my data from my phone. Thank God for that bit of technology, amIrite? 

Best this theif gets is what? $40? $50? What is the going rate for a smashed-glass iPhone that is locked and wiped? Any asshole muggers out there wanna weigh in?


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That totally sucks. I'm sorry this happened to you. We're so close to the announcement of the next iPhone. I bet if you put a "wish" out there somebody might have an iPhone4 out there that they never sold that they could let you use as a loner. (I'd offer you mine but it's out on loner for similar reasons.)

If he's dumb and didn't turn your phone off/remove the sim you can use "Find My iPhone" to locate him. Have you tried that yet?

do not like.

I'm so sorry, Brittney. So lame. :( That feeling of violation can be hard to shake.

Long time reader, first time commenter...

My iPhone was just stolen from me on Saturday and I SO FEEL YOUR PAIN. I had had mine for a total of 1.5 weeks. I am curious too, if there is a way for them to sell it after it is wiped and locked and reported stolen. IMO that phone is as good as a piece of trash now. I'm so sorry that happened to you (and me). Not a day goes by that I don't exclaim "M'FER I MISS MY IPHONE DAMNIT!", but then I get over it because it's gone and not coming back.

feelin' your pain from Kansas City where bitches be stealin' iPhones too...

Couldn't you track where the phone was since you could remotely wipe and lock it?

For people wondering about the value of a locked phone, it takes 5 minutes to undo any lock you may have put on the phone and restore it back to factory settings. Apple should seriously come up with a better way to permanently lock stolen phones.

this same thing happened to me on friday. at 1:30 PM as i was walking the four blocks home from work. it was horrible. :( i feel your pain and am sorry this happened to you, too.

When I tried using the Find My iPhone app to locate the phone it said that the phone was "offline." I was able to wipe the data, and it said the next time the phone attempted to connect all data would be erased.

I so feel your pain! I got my iphone stolen in the 22 bus a couple months ago. Because I kinda fight to get it back, and so I knew who did it, I was able to file a report with the police. Fortunately, they found one of the girl and she's in jail. Unfortunately, I'll never get my phone back.

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