I was going to write a post called How I Stopped Biting My Fingernails, because I did just that, for many weeks. I woke up one day and decided I was going to stop biting my nails, so I went to the nail salon at 24th and Harrison and I asked them to put acrylic nails on my tiny stubs. When he began cutting the claws down to normal nail size I told him, "Short. Super short. So short you can't believe I came in her to have fake nails put on." Then I asked politely for him to file them very thin. He obliged me on all fronts. As a result I was able to use my hands without the nails getting in the way. I grew my natural nails beneath them long, and eventually moved on to a gel manicure, which is just your own nail with nail polish baked on with heat.

My hands looked great. I didn't even miss biting my nails, since nail biting isn't a nervous habit as much it is one of obessive grooming. It is vanity, actually. You see a snag or an uneven nail and so you begin to perfect it with your teeth. You can't stand to see your nails with one side even slightly rounder than the other. So you pull more at them with your teeth until you've made an improvement or your fingers bleed.

I let my last gel manicure go far too long without attention, and so they looked ragged. Grown out and obviously in need of a touchup. So while watching I movie I bit all my fingernails off. I write this with a Band-Aid on my middle finger, and it hurts every time I use it to hit a key.
My nails looked flawed and so I ripped them off with my teeth, one by one. Now, of course, they look jagged and short and terrible.
I'm going to try again. I'm going to get a manicure weekly if need be, cost be damned. I'm going to have to keep them perfect so I won't destroy them entirely. Because my compulsion to fix will override every time.